Kissing our children on the lips- When is too old?

This week Sam Faiers, of The Only Way Is Essex fame, featured in a TV show named ‘The Baby Diaries’ with her boyfriend and father of her baby, Paul.

Paul had many foibles according to viewers, but nothing caused more outrage than ‘the kiss’.

While discussing the impending birth of his first child with his Mum the pair got very emotional and shared a kiss, on the lips.

paul-mum-knightley

OMG.

Do you kiss your children on the lips? I do. Every single day.

Of course I don’t have a child older then 4 years so I don’t *think* this will be seen as odd.

When will I have to stop though? When will we be odd by kissing on the lips?

At what age will my child be when they lean in for a kiss as they have always done and I will be duty bound to say, sorry, that ship has sailed.

I’ll be honest, the kiss was lengthy and I have never seen a man of that age and his mother share a kiss in that way before. I took some time to process my thoughts on it.

Why do more adults not kiss in this manner? Well, because it prompts reaction like this of course.

We have such a sexualized view of the world we find it difficult to separate sex and affection. Affection does not always lead to sex.

I know you’re probably rolling your eyes and thinking here she goes on her soapbox again, but it is true.

We see similar arguments when it comes to parents bathing with their children. Nakedness does not always lead to sex.

Sex in our society is all encompassing but we are so much more than that.

We are affectionate and loving and crave closeness with the ones we love.

Kissing my children on the lips will never be anything more than an expression of the love and adoration I have for them and I hope they never feel so shamed by society they would have to turn their cheek.

A Bit Of Everything
Mummuddlingthrough

Nat Halfpenny

10 Comments

  1. Wholeheartedly agree with you! I love being affectionate with my kids (particularly because I don’t come from a tactile family, and thus crave those cuddles!) I think I’ll annoy them with it when they’re older lol.

  2. Well said! I didn’t see the programme you are talking about so I can’t comment on whether or not that kiss was weird, but generally speaking, I think if someone reads too much into a mother pecking her child on the lips, then they are the one with the problem, not the mother. #abitofeverything
    Debbie

  3. Really interesting Nat. I no longer kiss my parents on the lips, but I did for a long time. I’m not really sure when I stopped or why, but if it was to happen I don’t think it would be weird just a parent and child sharing an affectionate moment. Having three boys I am taking full advantage of the kisses and cuddles now, as I am sure once they hit their teenage years they will be far from willing to have a snuggle xx

  4. Really interesting post and I am no clearer on what i feel about it. Like you I have two young children and I kiss them on the lips and at the moment I can’t ever imagine that stopping. However, I no longer kiss my parents on the lips so I quess it will one day. Argh-don’t want to think about that day! #coolmumclub

  5. This is really interesting, I read an article by some ridiculous psychologist who claimed that kissing children on the lips was damaging! I think it’s a totally normal form of affection between parents and children!

    #coolmumclub

  6. It’s not something I’ve ever really thought about before! I still kiss my parents on the lips occasionally, as a goodbye or something. I suppose society is just so hypersexualised now that it’s the first thing that occurs to anyone whose family doesn’t do it. x #coolmumclub

  7. I completely agree! I think it’s sad that everything has become so sexualised. I still kiss my kids (4 and 2) on the lips and I can’t imagine the day when I will have to stop (but I realise I will have to!) #CoolMumClub

  8. I never kissed my parents on the lips, sometimes I do with my daughter, sometimes I don’t – it’s just whatever happens. And as for the naked bathing thing I balked when my mum said this to me about my partner the other day. People over think these things way too much when in fact there are other FAR greater things to be worrying about. Thanks for linking up to #coolmumclub lovely x

  9. My parents wernt huggy kissy people at all, so where to kiss was never an issue. I use to kiss my boys on the lips when they were very little, but these days its a kiss on the cheek. I could not tell you when or why the change occured, it must have been a subconscious move.
    Thanks for sharing with us, Tracey xx #abitofeverything

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